Dispatches

Monday, July 24, 2006

Today I'm thinking about shoes

Today I'm finally managing to post for the month of July. Now, there are lots of things going on. I could talk about war and war-mongering, and how important it is to talk about and study peace and diplomacy, rather than focus on conflict and war. Or I could talk about some intriguing aspect of popular culture (I rented "Good Night, and Good Luck" on the weekend--casting genius). I could even talk about how much rude people on public transit irritate me (well, there will probably be some of that near the end). But that's not what's on my mind today.

Today, I'm thinking about shoes. I'm not talking about a shoe fetish (that is, in fact, one thing I don't understand at all but let's not delve into those waters). I'm talking about trying to guess what a person is like or what mood a person is in by analyzing their shoes.



As I waited for my GO train at Union station tonight, I watched dozens of people walk past me. And after 15 minutes of intense study, I think I've got a pretty good working hypothesis. There are, basically, three kinds of shoes: practical, semi-practical/not wholly impractical, and impractical. The people in the most impractical shoes--mostly women, but I'm not ready to go there yet--were usually in a hurry but not so successful at hurrying. The people in the practical shoes were generally looking pretty tired and some were rushing while others were not. I'm thinking that the people in the best moods were the ones wearing the shoes that were stylish yet practical. These were people whose shoes inspired me to say, "Those are some cool shoes." But these were also shoes that did not look like they could fall off the person's feet at a moment's notice.

That, my friends, is how my brainpower has been spent today. Well, the other thing my brain did on the train was imagine that I were one of those B- or C-list superheros, like Matter-Eating Lad, who had a power that seemed trivial but used correctly, could save the day. Specifically, I was dreaming that I could cripple a cell phone with my thoughts. Wouldn't it be cool if I could walk into any situation and disable a specific cellphone that was irritating, or just telepathically power down every cell phone in my vicinity? I could be, uh..., "Cellular Manipulation Girl"? Suggestions for a better name are welcome.

Also, did you know that "floatation" can be spelled without the first "a," so it becomes "flotation"? I find this disturbing.

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